After a challenging year of injury and tragedy, the Commonwealth 10,000m champion explains why she wants to keep pushing her limits

Call it an inner drive, a guiding force or simply a gut instinct but, when it comes to running, Eilish McColgan has always had something inside telling her to keep going. She listens to it every time.

It pushed her onward when she was a student, happily living the student life but still showing up for training and finding herself being drawn towards taking athletics more seriously. She took heed of it in 2011 when she shattered a bone in her foot during the first televised race of her career and was told she would never run again, yet made it to the Olympics the following year. It was there again in 2015 when another ankle problem required surgery and she made it to a second Games 12 months later. And she is aware of it now as the diligent rehab process from another long-term injury issue continues.

This time last year, the 33-year-old Scot was hot-footing it from one awards ceremony to another, being showered with accolades following a year in which she broke multiple records and won European medals but also so memorably landed the 10,000m Commonwealth title in Birmingham, the story writing itself as she followed in the footsteps of her illustrious mother and coach, Liz.

Fast forward 12 months and Eilish would just like to be able to go for a run. The comeback signs are improving and, as she chats to AW, the first sessions on the alter G treadmill are being planned. There is still a long way to go, though, which is why she is leaning on that internal prompting once more.

The trouble stems from a knee issue which blighted her 2023 season. A year which had begun in tremendous style and promised much with British record-breaking performances over 10km and the half marathon suddenly came to a crashing halt.

In the closing stages of the run in which she became the first British woman to win the Berlin half marathon, McColgan felt her hamstring go. It was a by-product of that problem with her left knee, which she admits isnt entirely resolved.

A keenly anticipated marathon debut in London was shelved before subsequent ambitions to compete at the World Championships in Budapest, the Great North Run and then the World Road Running Championships were also quashed.

I was so determined to showcase the fitness I had built, she says. I had two brilliant races and in training I was absolutely flying. Im glad I did them because, had I trained all winter up to the spring then had to miss London and had nothing to show for it I think mentally I would have been in a more challenging spot.

Right now it feels quite far away, because I am really starting from scratch again, but if youve been there and done it once then it does give you that belief that you can do it again.

That faith is something McColgan also discusses in the new BBC documentary Eilish McColgan: Running in the Family, which centres around trying build an athletics career while having the added pressure of being compared against a mother who became the very best in the world.

It provides an insightful portrait not just of the mother/daughter dynamic but also of the team effort which goes into an athletes performances and career. Liz is a key presence throughout but so, too, is Eilishs partner the Olympian and serial British 800m champion Michael Rimmer who travels everywhere with her to fulfil just about every role from coach to pacer to physiotherapist.

A few weeks before the programme aired, the three of them sat down to watch it together, alongside Lizs husband and Eilishs stepfather John Nuttall the 1994 Commonwealth 5000m bronze medallist, 1996 Olympian and well-known figure in British athletics at their home in Doha.

It was really special. All three of them got quite emotional, which meant a lot to me, says Eilish. There was a lot of the behind the scenes stuff that I had never even seen some of the interviews they had of me when I was 12, 13 and from some races. So it was really special to watch that and also to see [old footage of] my mum and dad when they were around the age I am now. Obviously I have no recollection of that.

Even seeing my grandad my mums dad who passed away quite a while ago now, it brought back a lot of really good memories for us as a family. It was a special moment.

It became even more poignant given that, just a few days later, Nuttall died suddenly from a heart attack at the age of just 56. His passing has shaken the family but, though such events can often lead to a new perspective or re-evaluation for those left behind, Eilish is not about to claim the tragedy has changed her outlook on the life she leads. She would like to think she has always had a healthy attitude in that sense.

My mum had planned for a future and retirement with John, she says. Theyd planned to do things together for her 60th next year and then Johns and so its now the realisation of oh, s***, weve worked so hard to have these moments together and it makes you question what was all that for? You work so hard and you dont get those moments together. For me, its confirmed that I do have the right mindset with regards to stuff like that.

With Michael, Im in such a privileged position where we can travel together and we do have some amazing memories. I can say that, if I got hit by a bus tomorrow and I didnt make it that Id be really proud and really happy of the life that Ive lived thus far.

I think thats a nice thing to be able to feel and to say but [Johns passing has] definitely made me continue to do what Im doing and not taking athletics so intensely. I know, for a lot of people, running can be super intense and it becomes unhappy, but I dont want it to ever be like that for me.

A recent conversation with her father Peter, himself a former international steeplechaser, provided further validation of that perspective of enjoying the moment.

Last year was such a dream season for me and I remember getting invited to all these award ceremonies, says Eilish. My mum told me that when she was younger she never went to the awards, because she was always just so focused on doing her training and going to the next race. When she looked back she saw that she missed out on a lot of things because she never appreciated the moment. I didnt want to be like that.

My mum and dad both questioned how many awards ceremonies I was going to but I was like: Im going to do them. I want to enjoy this because I dont know if Ill ever have it again.

My dad called me after John passed. Hed seen the documentary and found it very emotional, too. He said: You went to all these awards ceremonies, you did it all, and Im glad you did that, because you dont know whats round the corner. Youre someone that can say, when you do retire, that you wont have any regrets. And I dont.

Even if I quit running tomorrow, I would feel like I have no regrets, because I did everything I possibly could have done and I did it the right way. Ive tried my best. And if this is the best it gets, then great.

And yet there still lurks that feeling there is more to come. McColgan might be entering the latter part of her career but is taking inspiration from the likes of Kiera DAmato, Sara Hall and Sinead Diver, who have all been able to enjoy extended careers.

This year has definitely been challenging, but 2011 was challenging for me and 2015 was challenging for me, so I think because Ive had big moments like that its been a little bit easier to think: This doesnt feel like the end, she adds.

Theres something still telling me that I can get back and I can go again for another couple of years. Its just about navigating the lows at the moment, knowing that its not going to last forever. Ill come out the other end of it at some point.

When that point will come is as yet unknown. There will be no repeat of the big build-up to one race target, which is what happened at London this year. In fact, there are no race plans in the diary just yet.

Ill race when Im ready to race and when my bodys ready to race. It just want to give it the time it needs to get back to that level again, says McColgan.

If its ready in time for the London Marathon then that would be amazing but, if it isnt, then well turn our attention to the British Championships 10,000m (McColgan already has the Olympic qualifying standard) and look towards Paris, then an autumn marathon instead.

Making it to the French capital would signal the fourth Games of McColgans career.

It would obviously be a huge achievement itself to get there, she says. I dont know what it is, its hard to explain and I dont know why it happens, but I just feel like something is telling me that Im not quite finished yet.

Eilish McColgan: Running in the Family is streaming on BBC iPlayer